- “I do”.Two big words that would change the rest of my life forever.
June 12, 2005 was the day. While the whole nation celebrated Independence Day, I was foregoing my own. I was getting into a lifetime partnership with Jake, sworn before God and witnessed by family and friends.
I knew I was totally ready for the commitment but the fear of the unknown, I must admit, shook me up a bit.
I was challenged by the fact that marriage didn’t come with a handy manual. Hardwork, teamwork and lots of patience and understanding were the things we had to have to somehow to make the marriage as happy as possible.
In retrospect, I would say it was the best decision ever. It was finally the kind of change that I’ve come to embrace.
Certainly, life had a way of teaching me. I had to welcome changes to be able to move forward. So goodbye ‘singlehood’ and hello married life!.
But two months before the wedding, I lost my Dad to cancer. What bigger adjustment could there be than living your life without a father that you’ve known, loved and honored all your life? How do you spend the rest of your life when a part of it is gone?
That same part that meant going to the park as a child, going on out of town trips, travelling all the way to Nueva Ecija to buy kesong puti or a pack of burong mustasa! I remember shrieking in delight each time we drove near the take out window of a bakeshop in Rustan’s Cubao in the 80′s to get a bag of caramel popcorn, cheap thrill! Hahaha!. Pure childhood bliss! And of the fun times we bonded over, he would say, “Oh, you will remember me doing these for you when I’m gone”.
Yet Dad left this world just as I was about to enter a new one. At that time, I could not imagine death and happiness in one sentence. He died and I was getting married. But I realized that I had to snap out of my sorrow because I knew Dad was watching over us with a smile on his face.
A few months after the wedding, we would find out that we were expecting our first child. Jake and I were ecstatic. Finally, Dad must have sent the rainbows after the storm. I was finally settled and happy.
Now, I have started making new adventures with my daughter, Sam. It’s ‘Dad and me’ all over again. I drive her to school every single day, color, draw and paint together… ahhh, fun times! And oh! We do go to the park often, too.
Today, I realize, changes do happen for a reason. We may not welcome them at first, but later on, their significance begins to unravel before us in the strangest of ways.
I can’t be happier now. With my precious daughter and the best husband with me, I’m ready to overcome anything.
Life is sweet.
Happy Birthday, Sam!
Please know that Dad and Mom love you very much.
Sharing with you a poem Jake made for Sam shortly before her birth:
NEW EYES
Tomorrow’s light descends
on us, its glow bursting
into a million pieces
to show
us what the edge of this earth
brings—
A garden of colors
soon embraces
us while the scent of orange petals
waft through the air;
we lie down on this bed
of half-open buds, holding
forever’s promise in our hands,
even as thorns vainly prick
through our now common skin.
Nearby, a gaggle
of nursery rhymes
and voices of glee banish
the silence; we strain
our ears
to the only song
we will soon hear.
The light dances
once more before our eyes
and swirl around our heads
as we clasp
each other’s hands
and step
into the glow
that the edge
of this earth brings.
—jake y.
